Our blog gives abuse, domestic violence survivors a voice

Our blog gives abuse, sexual assault and domestic violence survivors a voice. Our goal is to encourage survivors as they heal. Do you have an original poem or article that you want to share? Become a guest blogger and add your voice to this blog. Email us at countmein@hopeforhealing.org to find out more.

Wear purple ribbons during DVAM

Here are a few more ways that you can be a part of our work

DVAM
Next month is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. In 2011, we posted a month long series of status updates to raise awareness on social media sites. Survivors and friends from across the globe joined in to promote these updates on their own social media sites like Twitter and Facebook. You are invited to join us again in 2012 and raise your voice. The status updates are available here for Domestic Violence Awareness Month.

Internet Radio
We are recruiting people who want to share on our internet radio show Voices of Hope. Show guests need only a cell phone or computer and microphone. Each 30 minute segment is available indefinitely as a podcast. We are also on the lookout for chat room volunteers. The room can be open during each segment.

Conference calls
This is a new way that our organization can give survivors a voice. We are planning to schedule conference calls in October. Abuse survivors and friends will have the opportunity to phone in and share with others. To allow for conversation flow, the number of participants will be limited. Look for more details to come.

Clergy training
Abuse survivors can help us spread the word about the clergy training. We will also be offering survivors the chance to briefly their your experiences. Our typical training course is six segments. This year, we will be offering short classes of about 1 hour duration and may offer the full course.

What do you think? Would you like to raise your voice to support other survivors? Contact us to get started. As always, if you have additional ideas or comments, then just let us know. Leave a message in the comments section to share your ideas with the world.

Education outreach dispay at men's conference

Many thanks to those of you who stopped by our booth at Calling All Men. We appreciate each and every one of you. Talking to you, hearing your stories and providing you with the tools that you need are what we are here for! We can help with the following:

• Survivors - We can provide support, understanding and help you locate emergency resources
• Pastors - We can provide training to help you understand the unique needs of victims who are already within your congregation. Our staff can help you create a resource list so that you will be ready to help your parishioners at a moment's notice. We also have pulpit helps, responsive readings and bulletin inserts. Contact us for more information.
• Friends - We can help you by providing you with the support, education and resources that you need to be better able to help your friends.

No one deserves to be a victim of domestic or sexual violence. No who is dealing with these issues needs to feel alone. Outreach displays help us get the word out and reassure other victims. Thanks to Calling All Men for allowing us to get the message out. Would you like us to display at your event? Email countmein@hopeforhealing.org today.

New year, new possibilities

A new year brings new possibilities. All too often we make resolutions that fall by the wayside. However; sometimes we dream and achieve the impossible. 

Many of resolve to lose weight, get fit, hike on the Appalachian Trail, stop smoking or make other high intensity promises to ourselves. If we fall short of the mark we yell at ourselves inside our heads and sometimes verbally. We put ourselves down because that is what we are programmed to do. Most often, a setback doesn't mean that we are not achieving. It simply means that we have lost sight.

A friend of mine set a goal to lose 50 pounds in a year. Her goal was to lose 12.5 pounds in 3 months, 25 pounds at six months and the rest by the end of the year. She was very excited about her plan and told all of her friends. 

The first three months went by and she reported meeting her goal. At six months she was just a few pounds shy of meeting her goal. I was and still am very proud of her for getting that far! She wasn't. Instead of being able to be happy with her 20 pound weight loss all she saw was that she fell short of her goal. To this day, she hasn't spoken of trying to lose any more weight. It's been over a year.

Some of us have been brainwashed by our abusers to keep us from seeing the positive steps  that we make every day. Let us all resolve this year to see the accomplishments for the wondrous steps that they really are.  If we can't see our achievements, let us find friends who can. 

This may be the best resolution that we can ever make. Together, we can heal and we will.

Presenting a workshop on teen domestic violence

We're gearing up to present on teen domestic violence Thursday. The workshops will be held in partnership with another nonprofit organization in the Knoxville/Oak Ridge area.

At Hope for Healing.Org we're always glad to work with other nonprofits. It expands the team and broadens the impact that we can all have on the attendees. Discussing teen domestic violence is difficult. It's never easy to think that our kids could be victims of something so heinous.

The fact is that like adults, teens become victims of domestic violence daily. Many of the high school girls that you talk with either know someone who is a victim or is in an abusive relationship.

I would like to say that we don't see this in the kids that we work with. The problem is that we do. But it goes further than that. High school victims of abuse are more likely to become victims of domestic violence in adulthood. They can also have a long list of problems in that affect their high school performance.

This is a hard subject to discuss but one that we must have. If you aren't sure how to talk with your teen about abuse contact the National Teen Dating Hotline for help.

Domestic violence and Memorial Day

Memorial Day officially kicks off the beginning of summer. It's time to plan swimming pool parties, backyard barbeques with friends and for domestic violence survivors to create safety plans.

In addition to fun, summer also means a spike in temperatures and tempers. This combination can lead to an increase in incidents of domestic violence. That's why it can be important for survivors to consider safety planning. If the worst happens, what will you do? How will you get out of the house? Then what?

Hopefully you will never need a plan. But, if you think that you might it's much better to create one before you need it. An advocate from your local domestic violence program can help you create a safety plan. It only takes a phone call or a visit.

Everyone at Hope for Healing.Org wishes you a safe, happy Memorial Day and summer.

Blog to Raise awareness for Sexual Assault Awareness Month

Getting in on Sexual Assault Awareness Month is easy. Join our SpeakOut in April 2011. All you have to do is post this update to your favorite social media site, Facebook page or Twitter account. It's easy to re-tweet our messages. Just follow our executive director on Twitter. When one of our updates pops up just re-tweet it to your followers. 

Ready to go? Here's your update:

April 14, 2011

Blog it. Post it. Talk about it. Get involved. Sexual Assault Awareness Month #SAAM

Every 2 minutes someone is sexually assaulted

This is one of the ugliest statistics yet. According to the Rape Abuse Incest National Network someone in the United States is sexually assaulted every 2 minutes. Think about it. Do the math. There are 60 minutes in an hour, 1440 in 24 hours.

Why do we have such a high number for something so preventable? No + no = no. It's a simple equation.

You can make a difference by spreading the word. Send the message that sexual assault it not ok. The social media status update for today is listed below. Copy and paste it to your Facebook page or social media site. Send it out on Twitter. Post it to Digg, StumbleUpon or Yahoo Buzz.

Do it all, because by the time you finish reading blog article another 2 minutes may be up.

Sexual Assault Awareness Month

Social Media Speakout

Status Update 

April 10, 2011

Somewhere in the U.S. someone is sexually assaulted every 2 minutes. No one deserves to be raped. #RAINN #SAAM

What we're doing for Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

Teen Dating Violence is not love no matter how much teens want to believe that it is. To get the message across, February has been designated as Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. Before you stop reading this blog post consider these statistics:

• 1:3 teenagers teenagers in a serious relationship reported that they have been concerned about being hurt physically by a boyfriend or girlfriend.
• One out of five of these teens say they have actually been hit, slapped, or pushed by a boyfriend or girlfriend.
• 81% of parents say that teen dating violence is not an issue or that they don’t know if it is an issue.

Victims and survivors of teen dating violence are more likely to get into fights and to perform below abilities in terms of schoolwork. It can also lead to drinking, drug abuse, and increased rates of teen pregnancy and even to suicide. Perhaps most importantly, it can become a pattern that follows the student throughout life.

As we recognize Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month we’re going to discuss more about:

• The problem
• Inviting guest bloggers to participate here.
• The effect on victims and survivors
• Special guests on our Voices of Hope online radio show
• What we can do to raise awareness
• Blogs that speak out
• How churches and youth directors can help
• Resources 

 Be sure to join our blog at the link to the right for updates throughout the month. It may be the most important thing that you do. 

Abuse survivors can make 2011 the best year yet

It's important for abuse survivors to find ways to stay positive. It's a new year, 2010 is now history that doesn't have to hold us back. We can look forward to all the good things that 2011 will bring. No one deserves good moments more than abuse survivors. 

Here are a few ideas that can help make that happen. Nothing is fool proof but these tips can help.

1. Expect the best and stay focused on it. Life isn't always rosy but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't expect the best. We have the right to expect good things to happen.
2. Keep a record. Journaling is a wonderful way to get in touch with ourselves. It also gives us a way to look back on our achievements. And yes, large or small you will have achievements. 
3. Focus on the positive. Try not to let the negativity get to you. You are smart. You deserve good things. You are valuable. Anyone who tells you differently is usually either lying to you or is jealous of you.
4. Set reasonable goals. Setting the goal to become a millionaire is great. It’s just that it’s unachievable for most of us. Begin your success with seemingly small things. Read that book. Take that art class. Do something nice for yourself each week. Write about it in a journal or quickly jot it down on a calendar.
5. Don’t put yourself down. As abuse survivors we tend to do that. The world will lie to us enough. Don’t put yourself down. See #2 for why.
6. Make good friends. We all need lots of good friends. This year is a good one to strengthen old friendships or make new ones. Look into attending church or volunteering as a way to expand your circle of friends.

Do you have any other ideas? Click "comments" below to leave  your thoughts for other abuse survivors.

Working with At Risk Youth in Restorative Justice

We get to work with our Restorative Justice kids tomorrow. It's always good to see them coming. They are a  really big help when it comes to getting things done. Like always, there's a lot to do.

The kids are going to get to help us create an educational and awareness display about Hope for Healing.Org. A stack of brochures have to be folded and we're going to get some purple ribbon cards created.

Since Valentine's Day is coming up we have something special for the kids. The four girls who are scheduled will each get a small box of candy that you see in the photo. It's a small thing to do to let the girls know we care.

It's interesting to see what happens when the kids create displays. This gives us the opportunity to explain about the cycle. As they learn about domestic violence the light bulbs come on. You can see it on their faces. Unfortunately, this isn't always the happiest moment.

All too often the kids are familiar with domestic violence on a personal level. It is a rare exception when the kids haven't experienced domestic violence. Another troubling thing is that just about all the kids have friends who are already involved in dangerous relationships.

What we're seeing echoes information on the Love Is Respect Foundation website. This is the site for the National Teen Dating Violence helpline. There is also a live chat feature where kids can get help. Both kids and parents may want to check out the website.

The 2011 New Year may be the best yet for Hope for Healing.Org

The 2011 New Year may be the best one yet for Hope for Healing.Org. We have a lot more opportunities this year than ever before. Each one of the opportunities is a chance to bring hope and healing for yourself and for others.

Fireworks

Our Voices of Hope lineup is still being developed for the New Year. We'll be changing our time slot to 30 minute segments. It's been pointed out to us that this will allow listeners to burn multiple shows onto a single CD easier. Beginning in February we'll be doing just that.

It's hard to believe that Voices of Hope began in February 2009. Since then, we've been downloaded or listened to almost 70,000 times! Thanks for making us successful. We are the only internet radio show of our kind that's devoted to meeting the needs of survivors.

Join our birthday party on 2/1/2011 at 12:00 pm. Call into 718.506.1545 to listen to us broadcast live or point your browser to www.blogtalkradio.com/voicesofhope. We will be giving something away every few minutes. Who will the lucky people be? If you tune in, it could be you.

Our mission is to reach others with the positive reinforcement that it takes to heal from abuse. You can help. Be sure to tell others about the celebration. It's a good way to raise awareness of domestic violence and sexual assault and its effects.

Later in February we'll be participating in a health fair and more internet radio shows.

Things start gearing up in March as we prepare for Sexual Assault Awareness Month in April. Look for more information to come.

There are lots of ways to get involved with Hope for Healing.Org. Blogging, participating in local events, spreading the good news that survivors can heal, helping with our newsletter and fundraising are just a few ways that you can get involved.

We need people who are willing to use Twitter, Digg, StumbleUpon and other social media platforms to help us get the word out. Would you be on our RT team? Let us know.

Find our more by emailing us at countmein@hopeforhealing.org.

Online investment terms abuse survivors need to know

Victims of domestic violence who have funds invested will sometimes have to move them. This can potentially protect investments and physical safety. Fortunately, many options are available. If investments have been handled by an abuser it’s important to learn some basic terminology.

This article isn’t written to give financial advice to a victim a domestic violence. It has only been written to help survivors understand some of the most basic terms that are used in the investment world.

Online Trading – This simply means that stocks are sold and purchased online. In this financial culture it is becoming more common for investors to take matters into their own hands. This type of trading is a popular way to do just that.

Online Broker – This person acts on behalf of an investor to execute trades of stock or other investments. It is typical for them to earn a percentage of any profits made during the transaction. Access is handled online. The fees charged by online brokers are typically much less than a traditional broker might charge.

IRA Accounts – IRA is an acronym that stands for individual retirement arrangement. It is also referred to as the acronym for individual retirement account. This simply helps investors set aside funds that will be available after retirement.

Mobile Trading – Smart phones can allow you to buy or sell stocks on a moment’s notice. Once you get set up for mobile trading you will be able to receive stock quotes in real time and instant access your watch lists and portfolio.

Stock Trading- This is the buying and selling of stock or other investments. It is frequently being handled by one of the methods mentioned in this article.

Survivors of domestic violence who need to protect investments need to thoroughly educate themselves. Financial resources that are specific to victims include the Allstate Foundation and NewSafeStart.org.

The links above will take you to the FirsTrade.com website where you can find more information.

Lavinia Master on Voices of Hope 11/23/2010

Lavinia B Masters will appear on Voices of Hope on 11/23/2010. This lady is a sexual assault survivor and advocate. She is also a published author and active speaker. Not only is she listed with the RAINN Speaker's Bureau and is a spokesperson for the Dallas Police Department Cold Case Program.

She'll be sharing her powerful testimony of faith, hope and determination. Be sure to point your browser to Voices of Hope at 12:00 Noon (EST). Listeners can tune in by computer to hear Lavinia B Masters or phone into 718.506.1545 after the show.

Beginning at 1:30 pm, this segment of Voices of Hope will be available as a free download. Use your iTunes account to download the free podcast. Place it on your MP3 player, burn it to a CD or share it with friends. You'll want to hear the story of Lavinia B Masters over and over.

Find out more about her on:
Facebook
Imagine Publicity
SAVE Ministry

Lot's Wife discussion in Biblical Voices of Hope help resources

Thanks to everyone who tuned in tonight for our second segment of Biblical Voices of Hope about the journeys of women in the Bible. Our first segment about Eve was a huge success. We hope you enjoyed tonight's show as well.

Gayle and Teresa discussed the story of Lot's wife as found in Genesis Chapter 19:1 - 29. This is the story of Lot and his family. It begins as a rescue. It ends with the death of Lot's wife as she looked back at the cities and was turned into a pillar of salt.

During tonights Biblical Voices of Hope, Gayle and Teresa talked about Lot's family. To these ladies, two aspects of the story stand out that may be of help to survivors. One is that survivors should look to the future for hope and new life. The other thing that Gayle and Teresa talked about was the lack of faith that Lot's wife showed.

Other resources that were referenced during Biblical Voices of Hope include:

• Genesis 13:10-11
• Luke 17:32
• Wikipedia: How is salt made?

These Bible scriptures and others can be researched online through this link.

We are in the process of putting a study guide together for this segment of Biblical Voices of Hope. Keep watching the Hope Blog for details.

Hope reminder:

If you are spending too much time looking back in your life we want you to know that help is available. Resources that you may be able to tap into include local and national hotlines, help centers in your area and your pastor. We have two hotlines listed on the Hope Blog that may also be of help.

Join us for Biblical Journeys of Women; Lot's Wife 9pm tonight

Join us tonight at 9pm on Biblical Journeys of Women. Gayle, Sharhonda and Teresa will discuss Lot's wife. Our scripture reference will be Genesis 19. Our focus scripture will be Genesis 19:26. 

The scripture tells us that two cities were to be destroyed when Lot's family was able to get to safety. When Lot's wife looked back she was turned into "a pillar of salt". 

What hope, if anything, can a survivor of sexual or domestic violence find in this story? Are there insights that can help us find our path to healing? Tune in as our survivors tackle these issues.

www.blogtalkradio.com/voicesofhope

Monday, 11/22/2010

9pm EST

Call in to make a comment or listen live. Our number is 718.506.1545.

See you online. :)

PSA on sexual and domestic violence

View our new PSA about sexual and domestic violence. It's on You Tube and is only our second one by Hope for Healing.Org. The first was made by teen volunteers who participated in our Hope Youth program. It too is available on You Tube.

Let us know what you think of our newest one by leaving a comment below.
Your feedback is very important to us. Here it is...

Voices of Hope booking into February

Good news! Voices of Hope on Blog Talk Radio is now booking through February. If  you have a story or proivde a service that would help our listeners, contact us. We're always glad to hear from you. Send us an email to voicesofhope (at) hopeforhealing.org for consideration.

With one exception, our shows air on Tuesday at 12Noon (eastern). Point your browser to www.blogtalkradio.com/voicesofhope or call into 718.506.1545 to listen live or comment. Be sure to mark the show as a favorite to set a reminder and follow us on Twitter to get updates.

Here's our November lineup for Voices of Hope on Blog Talk Radio. We think you'll like what  you see. :)(Many thanks to Imagine Publicity for helping us get everyone scheduled!)

Nov. 23 - Lavinia Masters is an author and advocate with a story to tell!
Nov. 30 - Jilian Maas Backman is an intuitive who can help you find your path to healing.
Nov. 22 at 9:00 pm. - Biblical Voices of Hope

Keep checking back to this blog. We'll have the Dec. schedule posted soon.

Domestic violence and investments

Domestic violence cuts across all socioeconomic groups. Professional women with high income can have as much to lose as women with less income. Survivors may not have time to think about domestic violence and investments until after physical safety is assured. 

There will be time later to talk with advisers about your portfolio. When working on a safety plan with an advocate a survivor may want to keep the following in mind ...

When a victim of domestic violence has participated in online trading it’s doubly important to secure the password. Working out a safety plan with an advocate can help you decide when to contact your online broker.

Your broker should be able to give you information on IRA accounts or answer other investment questions.

Domestic violence victims should take care to protect mobile trading information just as closely as for online trading. Cell phones may be prone to certain risks that may not be readily apparent to survivors. An advocate should be able to help with this.

If stock trading or any other type of investing has been done in both the abuser and the victim’s name it may be critical to get help.  In this case, contacting your broker and an attorney may be necessary.

Victims of domestic violence need to remember that safety first is a good rule of thumb. While no one wants to have problems with investments these issues can generally be sorted out later.

Nothing should ever take place ahead of safety and physical security for the victim and children.

Resources which may be of help:

Click to Empower  

New Safe Start

~~ Many thanks to First Trade for sponsoring this blog.~~

Domestic Violence Display At Calling All Men Event

For the 3rd year Hope for Healing.Org will have a domestic violence awareness display at Calling All Men!

This United Methodist  Men event happens August 13-14, 2010 at Cokesbury UMC. Over 20 agencies will be participating with information about our programs. Be sure to stop by!

We appreciate the invitation to set up at Calling All Men again this year. Domestic violence effects men, women and children. To end abuse it takes educating both women and men.

Our display will have posters, awareness cards, brochures and more. Come by and see what we have. It's the perfect time to gets lots of information to take back to your church.

See you there!

Domestic Violence PSAs on YouTube

YouTube is known for music, movies and videos. Now it's gaining a positive reputation in the fight against domestic violence. A number of PSAs (public service announcements) have been created and posted on YouTube. These have been created by organizations, students and individuals.

The following video is by the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
1.800.799.SAFE